Posts tagged Perspective
6 Steps to New Attitude
Aug 20th
Is it time for an attitude adjustment? Are you feeling down, bummed, frustrated, etc.? It could be that a change in your attitude would make all of the difference in the world for you. You do not have to be in a negative state. That is a choice you have made and you can choose to change it. It is totally up to you. We get caught up in believing that we have no choice about how we feel but in reality we do. We make choices about how we feel and how we are going to react to something all of the time. We just are not always aware we are making those choices.
The fact is that we are always at choice. We just need to slow down and think about it. When something happens and we get an emotional reaction we can choose right then and there to feel differently about it. That may now always be easy but we do have the choice. We just have to make it.
Sometimes we get in a rut of feeling bad. We do not seem to have the energy to do anything least of all deciding we do not want to feel that way anymore. Sometimes there is a payoff to us for feeling miserable. We get attention from other people or we hope they feel sorry for us. None of those payoffs work to our advantage in the long run so try not to fall prey to them. Think about it. What is the payoff to you for feeling like you do? Is that what you really want?
So, if we are at choice about how we feel how do we change our feelings? It is not as hard as you might think.
Change your perception of what is happening. Look for the good or the “silver lining” and appreciate that. Write down all of the things you are grateful for. Sometime that helps you change your perspective about what is going on. Hang out with some upbeat people. Usually their attitude rubs off on you. Do not feel sorry for yourself. Think of all the positives in your life. Think of a specific time when you were really happy. Capture the feelings and make them really strong in you. Now move around and shake that state off and then try to get it back again. Practice this until you can call those great feeling up at will. Get busy doing something for someone else. It is hard to be down when you are thinking of others.
If you have tried a couple of these things while you were reading this you are probably already feeling better. Try them all and then choose the ones that work best for you.
Improving Self Confidence and Overcoming Shyness
Aug 17th
Self confidence is mainly destroyed by personal doubt and disbelief in oneself. If, for instance, your inner critic tells you are not good looking, then obviously you won’t love and accept yourself and may consequently lose self confidence. As this happens over and over again, with lots of different aspects of our lives, our confidence is eroded, slowly but surely. Improving self confidence is a process and will take a little work but the results will be more than worth it.
Most of us have met people who are very shy, or weak in establishing social relations; they find it so hard to connect with others – we have to understand and appreciate them. They may well be on the way to improving self confidence and need to be supported, not put down further. If you are the shy person, you cannot beat up yourself because you are shy; you can choose to work on overcoming your shyness by learning more about it, doing activities and exercises which can improve your self confidence or in some circumstances visiting an expert therapist.
Close friends, family or acquaintances can also be of help in improving self confidence. Our close friends and relations understand us better than anyone else. You can ask your friends what they see as your good points, they will often come up with things that are completely unexpected. They will also reassure you that you are not alone, many people feel exactly the same. In some cases, our feelings about ourselves may be completely unsupported; if you think you are terrible at something, ask a friend and you may be surprised at the answer!
Also, remember the key to improving self confidence is to accept and appreciate the way you are now. You may think that you are too fat but beating yourself up won’t make you thinner! Accept and love yourself then you can work towards making changes you want to. Put things in perspective: there are likely to be people much bigger than you and there are others with very slim bodies who long to be larger!
Improving self confidence is well within your reach, but it will take a little effort on your part. However, a small amount of effort will lead to results which will surpass all your expectations.
