Posts tagged optimism
How to Stop the Flow of Negative Thoughts Permanently
Aug 27th
Do you know that negative thoughts emerge steadily like toxic fumes from the subconscious mind and pollute one’s conscious mind? Do you know this flow undermines one’s self confidence, self esteem, self worth, energy, strength, optimism, sense of adequacy, courage, ability to make clear and focused decisions, performance, mood and enthusiasm for life, resilience and one’s ability to feel totally in control of one’s mind and life, to name a few? Do you know this means that you are actually not fully in control of your mind, your actions or your life? Do you know that there is a way to permanently stop this negative flow at its source and reclaim your life and peace of mind? How does one do that you ask?
Those negative thoughts like their associated negative feelings are generated by negative memories from your past stored in your subconscious mind. These memories behave like little “factories” whose purpose it is to distort your perception of yourself, others and the world around you by sending “up” into your conscious mind thoughts/beliefs that are incongruent with the nature of your experience of life.
This is what many have referred to as ones’ emotional baggage or childhood conditioning. As you may know this is stuff that is deeply rooted and difficult to get rid of. Well actually, that’s not completely true, at least not any more.
You see, over 10 years ago while I was practicing as a psychiatrist I had a rude realization that changed not only my practice but my life. That realization was that many individuals were getting absolutely nowhere with many of the so called powerful therapies I had spent over 20 years of my life training in. Although I was disappointed by this realization it also spawned an insight into why these approaches were ineffective.
I realized that all individuals were identified with what they called their life history i.e. their emotional baggage. In other words they implicitly believed it represented who they were and what they were capable of. Well, if that life history was significantly limiting then that meant that they were significantly limited by it, or at least by their identification with it. I pondered whether it was possible for one to dis-identify with their life history i.e. whether they could come to the point where they knew and felt like that history no longer represented them or defined them.
Out of this reflection emerged a remarkable coaching process that literally helps one permanently erase any and all negative memories along with their associated limiting negative thoughts and feelings. This is akin to peeling away one’s so called “identity” as defined by this history and redefining themselves on their own terms. Can you imagine how this might leave one feeling? Probably not, because few individuals have a reference point of experience from which to even begin to comprehend what I’m talking about.
Let me say however that it leaves one feeling irreversibly empowered, confidence, peaceful, clear, focused, balanced, centered, energized, adequate, strong, resilient, independent, capable, optimistic, and alive etc.
If you would like to learn more about this process kindly visit the web site below where you can also request a free e-copy of my book or where you can request a free introductory telephone coaching consultation that will begin to help you discover who you really are.
Optimism and Authentic Happiness
Aug 18th
It has been agreed upon the fact that highly emotionally intelligent persons have a great dose of optimism. Being optimistic about something implies adopting a strategic approach to a challenging situation. Apart from acknowledging the difficulty, an optimistic person believes that there is a solution to it. Optimism involves as well actively exerting efforts toward the possible successful outcomes.
The list below will reveal a few tips that will help you become more optimistic:
admit when you are in a difficult situation;recognize and acknowledge your top skills that may help you in dealing with the crisis situation you are in;identify where you can get help with the skills you lack;address problems in an active way the moment they arise;recount similar situations when you managed to overcome the problems;concentrate on applying solutions going forward in order not to get stuck in the past;think of negative circumstances as challenges to be overcome.In order not to overestimate and inflate your self-esteem, try the best to honestly and critically evaluate yourself. Be critically honest about your weaknesses and strengths so that you can build true confidence in yourself.
Authentic happiness is gradually achieved through optimism and practicing several activities that can elevate your state of mind and, thus, further affect aspects of your life success. Martin Seligman, who is a former President of the American Psychological Association and one of the initiators of the Positive Psychology movement, identified three types of authentic happiness that one can experience and these are:
pleasant life: instant satisfaction, hedonism;good life: obtaining the things you desire;meaningful life: subordinating yourself to a larger and more worthwhile context than personal pleasures and desires.By combining the three types one can reach authentic happiness for the full life. Martin Seligman contrived a series of exercises destined to increase happiness among the visitors of his website. Two of the exercises proved to have a long-term effect, lasting over six months. Here they are:
Three good things in life: it implies that you record daily three things that went well for the respective day, as well as the causes of or possible explanations to those three positive events. Carry out the exercise for a week.Using signature strengths in a new way: this exercise requires that you choose from a list with your personal skills the one that best defines you, called “the signature strength”. By establishing a top five strengths you can try to use one of them in a new and different way for a week whether it is about leadership, honesty, creativity, humility, enthusiasm, teamwork, self-control, social skills, optimism etc.
