Posts tagged Medicine

How can you be happier more of the time, no matter what your circumstances?

How does one person manage to be up and going for it day after day, and others just can’t quite get it together? They’re always negative. They’re always down. They’re always grumpy. They’re always feeling tired. Why?

Well, it really is a choice more than anything else. There are only 4 ways known to medicine and psychology that emotions are created. Of these 4 ways, unless there’s something #1 physiologically wrong with you (first way), or #2 you’re brain damaged, or #3 you are chemically imbalanced, then it’s #4 what you’re thinking, your self-talk and mental images.

To become outrageously happy most of the time you need to focus on what you can do something about, on the solutions, instead of focusing on what you can’t do anything about, or the problems. Happiness really comes from positive self-talk. 65%-75% of the time, happiness is from a positive thinking pattern. It’s from giving yourself a primary focus on things you can do something about. It’s a choice, and you make that choice moment to moment, every day

About six months ago, there was a gentleman who was referred to me by his doctor for severe depression. He was an executive for a major company, and he had been laid off. He had not been able to find work for almost a year. Anti-depressants didn’t seem to be working, nothing he tried seem to help.

When he began working with me, one of the things that immediately stood out, was that he was continuously focused on the bad. He focused on the fact that he couldn’t find interviews. And when he did find the interviews, he felt so desperate to get the job that the interviews were lousy.

He had totally forgotten to think about all the positive aspects of his life.

He had a great relationship with his wife. He had wonderful children who were happy and healthy and they loved school. They liked doing things with the family. His health was superb overall, except he was depressed. He was physically strong and healthy. He was brilliant. He was regularly learning new things. The guy had a lot going for him. But he forgot about all of that.

He spent all of his time focused on what wasn’t working. “I can’t find a job. We need money.” Desperation. It caused him huge stress and lots of problems.

The first thing I had him do was to begin to focus on what he could do something about, his thinking patterns. And when he began to change his choice of focus, suddenly, life began to be a little better. His depression began to lift. His wife said he began to be more like his old self. He began to be more energetic, and he and his children had more fun playing together.

He had an interview set up for a new job. When going in there, instead of going in depressed and desperate, he had worked on his attitude. He went in positive, telling himself, “I might get it, I might not. But, I believe I can make a positive impression on these people. This would be good for me and good for them.” He went in with a proactive, powerful mindset.

Guess what? They hired him on the spot at more money than he was making prior to getting laid off!

After they hired him, his boss said the primary reason they hired him was that they wanted somebody on their team who was as positive and proactive as he was. They said his demeanor, the way he carried himself, and his positive attitude was exactly what they needed to take their company up the next step.

He was that man. But he had stopped focusing on the positive, and started focusing on what he didn’t have instead of what he did have. We each have that choice.

Every moment, every day, you make that choice. You can either focus on the “good stuff” in life and what you have, or you can focus on the bad stuff and what you don’t have. When you focus on what you don’t have, you’ll have less. Focus on what you do have; the world will give you more. The universe supplies all kinds of things to you. It’s your choice of focus.

Make everyday a positive focus. Be proactive. Take steps and each one can help move you closer to your ultimate goal, to the things you want to attain in your life. You can have whatever you want-better relationships, improved health, more money, better lifestyle, you can have it all. You can transform your life.

The Best of Success to You, Dr Larry Iverson.