Posts tagged Knees
Does Too Much Self-Esteem Create Mediocrity?
Oct 9th
Do we hand out praise to readily and is it causing an inflated sense of self-esteem within our society making being mediocre, or worse the norm.
I recently looked up the definition self-esteem on the internet and the general consensus of opinion was that it means; self-esteem reflects a person’s overall evaluation or appraisal of his or her own worth. The reason I looked it up was because I was wondering if it was possible to have a high level of self-esteem but in reality you were only mediocre.
Let me explain what I mean; we are bombarded with talent and celebrity (so called) ‘look at me I can make myself look a complete fool and still get paid for it’ shows on our televisions. Obviously the participants must think that they have at least some sort of chance of winning, so they must have a high level of self-esteem. But after watching some of these shows I get the impression that a very high percentage of the participants have little to no talent at all, but if you told them that, they would look at you as if you were a lunatic.
My theory about this is that we heap praise upon people far too easily these days, giving them the impression that they are the bee’s knees, and upping their levels of self-esteem. In schools these days you get a certificate for turning up on most days, so what happens, the child is pleased with themselves, thinks that turning up most days is a high level of achievement and their self-esteem thermostat soars. This is only one example of praising mediocrity, and I don’t want you to get the idea that I think that mediocrity should be punished because I don’t. Give it some compassion, but don’t hand out certificates and cups for it.
Thankfully my television has an off button so I don’t have to watch mediocre celebrities and acts, but it does concern me that we have produced a generation, and seem determined to continue produce future generations, who think that nearly being good at something is all that is necessary to achieve success.
The self-esteem thermostat of the nation is stuck on mediocre and for that to rise even as high as good we have to raise the bar before handing out trophies and certificates to the wannabes and ‘think they cans.’
A Fall From Grace – Not Confidence
Oct 6th
It’s easy to buoy up your confidence when you do the right thing and people notice and show appreciation for your ideas and actions. It’s effortless and we get an immediate reward from others that feels great. But there are other times when despite our best efforts things just don’t go exactly as we planned or it’s not as easy to do the right thing. What do you do when you falter?
Recently I was given an award, presented in front of a room full of 400 people at a large conference. As I jogged up to the stage I guess I tried to leap up two steps. It didn’t work. I tripped and fell just as I was taking the stage. Pain shot through my knees. I was mortified; all I could think about was my big butt facing the audience. You could hear a pin drop in the massive ballroom. The president of the company who was presenting the award winced.
Without missing a step, I sprang to my feet, grabbed the microphone from him and breathlessly said, “The only thing I bruised was my ego.” He threw his head back and laughed. The audience laughed. A dumb mis-step turned into a silly moment and it was over. I might have fallen onstage. Maybe I even experienced a brief fall from self-esteem. But I didn’t let it destroy my confidence outside.
Later, people came up and said, “I felt so bad for you. Are you okay?” Not a single person said anything mean-spirited. They might have been thinking those thoughts, but if they did, they politely kept them to themselves. When I spoke the next day, the room was packed, and I got a standing ovation.
There are other times when no one is looking and it’s still important to think about how your actions will impact your confidence level even when no one is looking.
Doing the right thing – even when others don’t notice – will increase your confidence. Last week I was at Starbucks and discovered a wallet with three $20 bills sticking out. Yes, I could’ve used that money. If I put it in my purse and tossed out the wallet no one would have noticed. But it wasn’t the right thing to do. That wallet belonged to someone else. I gave it to the Manager. I knew in my heart that if I didn’t do the right thing I would have a difficult time looking in the mirror for a long time. That would pull down my confidence and who knows what negative impact that could have for years to come.
Be gracious. Be bold. Don’t be afraid to shine when you have the opportunity. And when it’s just you and you have to make a decision to do the right thing – the good always comes back to you pressed down, heaped up and flowing over. You can hold your head up high and know you are a person who comes by your confidence because you deserve it.
