Happiness is a concept so widely discussed and so differently perceived by humans. Most of them think of it as pure hedonism or instant satisfaction. The pleasant sensation one experiences after eating chocolate, drinking a glass of fine wine, winning a prize or having a warm bath might be defined as happiness. But it has a short-term nature. One usually strives to achieve long-time pleasure and gratification that comes with true happiness.
An honest view of yourself and the surrounding world leads to identifying what is truly meaningful and important in your life and capitalizing on those virtues. Thus, filtering the significant aspects and values you can achieve true happiness. The entire process is influenced by one’s emotions. Emotional intelligence certainly contributes to the enhancement of the pursuit of happiness as the persons endowed with such an ability are optimistic, harmonized with their passions and emotionally self-aware.
Merriam-Webster’s Dictionary defines happiness as “a state of well-being and contentment” and “a pleasurable or satisfying experience”. This doesn’t restrict the source of happiness to the inner or outer realms. However, most of the people tend to believe that true happiness comes from inside, within. Ed Diener, the happiness-expert psychologist from the University of Illinois, has surveyed numerous persons in order to establish a hierarchy of most important things in humans’ life. Only 6 percent of the surveyed ones around the world have rated money as more important than happiness. 69 % have declared happiness as the most prominent and essential thing in life.
Many have claimed that people who have a more modest condition enjoy more the little things in life, whereas the rich ones tend to take the privileges for granted. The former work their way through hardship to discover how to really appreciate what life has to offer. The example of a rich and prestigious professor has to endorse this assertion. The respective American professor went for the first time to an international conference in Europe to present a scientific paper of his. He was quite excited for being there.
However, a colleague of his showed him what real appreciation of this opportunity meant. The latter was a young professor at a small college in the United States. He came from a working-class family and was the first one to complete university studies. He also traveled to Europe and abroad for the first time and his trip was funded by the college he was working at. His enthusiasm was even more intense due to the fact they were in England and his family originated in Wales, which determined him to retrace the castle that carried his family name. The prestigious professor was invited by the young one to join him in his quest. Arriving there, after difficulties caused by weather conditions and poor directions, the two had to pay for their access fee in spite of the name the young one bore. Nevertheless, he was very happy and touched by the experience he came to live. This proved to the prestigious professor that happiness had more to do with living to the fullest emotions and special opportunities rather than with material possessions.
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It has been agreed upon the fact that highly emotionally intelligent persons have a great dose of optimism. Being optimistic about something implies adopting a strategic approach to a challenging situation. Apart from acknowledging the difficulty, an optimistic person believes that there is a solution to it. Optimism involves as well actively exerting efforts toward the possible successful outcomes.
The list below will reveal a few tips that will help you become more optimistic:
admit when you are in a difficult situation;recognize and acknowledge your top skills that may help you in dealing with the crisis situation you are in;identify where you can get help with the skills you lack;address problems in an active way the moment they arise;recount similar situations when you managed to overcome the problems;concentrate on applying solutions going forward in order not to get stuck in the past;think of negative circumstances as challenges to be overcome.In order not to overestimate and inflate your self-esteem, try the best to honestly and critically evaluate yourself. Be critically honest about your weaknesses and strengths so that you can build true confidence in yourself.
Authentic happiness is gradually achieved through optimism and practicing several activities that can elevate your state of mind and, thus, further affect aspects of your life success. Martin Seligman, who is a former President of the American Psychological Association and one of the initiators of the Positive Psychology movement, identified three types of authentic happiness that one can experience and these are:
pleasant life: instant satisfaction, hedonism;good life: obtaining the things you desire;meaningful life: subordinating yourself to a larger and more worthwhile context than personal pleasures and desires.By combining the three types one can reach authentic happiness for the full life. Martin Seligman contrived a series of exercises destined to increase happiness among the visitors of his website. Two of the exercises proved to have a long-term effect, lasting over six months. Here they are:
Three good things in life: it implies that you record daily three things that went well for the respective day, as well as the causes of or possible explanations to those three positive events. Carry out the exercise for a week.Using signature strengths in a new way: this exercise requires that you choose from a list with your personal skills the one that best defines you, called “the signature strength”. By establishing a top five strengths you can try to use one of them in a new and different way for a week whether it is about leadership, honesty, creativity, humility, enthusiasm, teamwork, self-control, social skills, optimism etc.
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